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How to Enjoy Sexuality Despite Chronic Pain

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New Ideas for Sex with Chronic Pain
As you and your partner explore sexual intimacy again, expand your definition of making love and explore different ways to express physical intimacy:
  • Change your schedule. People often experience more pain at certain times of day, so it may help to make love at times when you feel the least pain.
  • Just touch. Touching and being touched increases feelings of intimacy. Try touching -- cuddling, massaging, kissing -- without intercourse as your goal.
  • Alternative positions. Experiment with different sexual positions that lessen physical strain, such as lying side-by-side. There are many good books that describe different sexual positions you and your partner can try.
  • Oral sex. As an alternative or complement to intercourse, oral sex can offer a gentle way to heighten your partner's sexual pleasure.
  • Use a vibrator. Vibrators can add pleasure during lovemaking without physical exertion. If lack of natural lubrication is a problem, there are many safe and effective over-the-counter lubricants that can help prevent pain associated with vaginal dryness. Ask your doctor or pharmacists to recommend one, or read the labels and experiment until you find one that you both like.
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  • Manual stimulation. Masturbation is a normal and healthy way to fulfill your own sexual needs, but it can also be shared. One partner may masturbate during lovemaking if the other partner is unable to be very active. And direct, manual stimulation is another way to please your partner.

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